Whoah.

Swedish women shock U.S. in semis
Posted: Feb.17, 2006, 12:52 pm CST; Updated: Feb.17, 2006, 2:21 pm CST

TORINO, Italy (AP) --
Women's Official Full Results
Team 1 2 3 OT SO Total
1 1 0 0 0 2
0 2 0 0 2 3

The U.S. women's hockey team made history Friday night - the wrong kind.

For the first time since international competition in women's hockey began in 1990, the U.S. and Canada won't meet in the championship match - and it's largely because of Kim Martin.

Martin made 37 saves and stopped all four American attempts in a shootout, while Maria Rooth had two regulation scores and the clinching shootout goal in Sweden's 3-2 victory in the semifinals.

Possibly the best thing ever to happen to women's ice hockey, and I honestly don't mean that with any snark towards the U.S. team. I actually feel somewhat gutted for them. However, with the Finns looking competitive, and the Swedes pulling off this monumentally unlikely victory, it appears the sport may be developing nicely at the international level. A lot of Canadians are celebrating as though this result automatically hands them the gold, but don't bet on it just yet...

Lame Moments in Sports #15

This is a couple of days old, but what the Hell:

Mighty Ducks of Anaheim to change name
Canadian Press
1/27/2006 12:17:29 PM

ANAHEIM, Calif. (CP) - The Anaheim Mighty Ducks are Mighty no more.

The NHL club said Friday it will change its name to the Anaheim Ducks starting next season, dropping Mighty from the moniker after nearly two thirds of fans surveyed said they supported the switch.

The lameness is not in the fact that the team is changing its name. That is, indeed, a good thing. The lameness comes from the the fact that for 13 (thirteen) fucking years the NHL included a team which the fucking Walt Disney Corporation had named after a fucking Emilio Estevez movie. This represented possibly the lowest point in the history of the League, and possibly the history of ice hockey overall. So we at Oi! Thump! say to the folks in Anaheim: get rid of it all. Everything associated with that hideous travesty of profit-driven business-think. Lose the name (simply switching it to "Anaheim Ducks," as is the plan, is not enough), the logo, the colours, the mascot, the entire shabang. Only then can the healing begin. And as far as your new name is concerned, no singular names, no weird-ass "Los Angeles Turnips of Somewhere North of Mexico Who Play in Anaheim" crap like your baseball team did, no replacing the "s" at the end of your name with "z", and for fuck's sake no ephemeral pop-culture references. Just be the "Anaheim Somethings" and get on with playing hockey.

Lame Moments in Sports #13

In which Steve Yzerman apparently is possessed by the ghost of Tiger Williams' career.

Red Wings captain Steve Yzerman has voiced his opinion about the new NHL - and so far, he's not a fan.

"Everybody keeps saying this is great. It's not great," Yzerman told the Detroit Free Press.

"It's not hockey."

Erm, baseball perhaps? Or golf?

"There are penalties all over," he told the Free Press.

Ya know, Steve, if the NHL had been calling penalties throughout your career the way they are now, you'd have about half again as many career points as you do now, so stop complaining.

"I'll just use Mathieu Schneider's penalty as an example. He steps up and takes his guy out, and his stick gets caught and the crowd cheers so the referee puts his hand up. There has to be some discretion. The referees have to use some judgment on what is a penalty and what is not. They've taken judgment out of it and I think it's somewhat made it easy on the referees just to call anything, because there is no judgment.

"Good referees used to have good judgment. Now they've taken that out of the game. I'm not saying I'm blaming the referees for it, I just feel the whole thing has to be adjusted and they have to look at this seriously. They can't continue to call irrelevant things that have no business being called."

Ok, this is actually the lame part of this whole thing. Read those two paragraphs, and try to find some sort of point in it, beyond some sort of vague sense that referees=bad. It's a beautiful example of jock-talk.

Yzerman, in his 22nd and possibly last NHL season, has two goals and four assists for the Red Wings in 2005.

You know, I do have a lot of respect for Steve Yzerman. Twenty-two seasons, several Stanley Cups, one of the biggest goals in the history of Team Canada, and generally a class act through it all. And that's why this whole thing is so disappointing. With interest in hockey up, a more entertaining game, in general, on the ice, and a heightened sense of parity across the league, to hear something like this from one of the game's supposed "ambassadors" is just sad. He'll probably get fined for this, and rightly so. Steve, the next time some media chappie asks you your opinion on the new NHL, please keep your mouth shut.

NHL Rings the Changes

NHL GMs suggest five changes
WebPosted Tue Feb 10 18:03:17 2004

CBC SPORTS ONLINE - The NHL is on the verge of drastic change.

NHL general managers agreed Tuesday to suggest five significant on-ice improvements to a panel comprised of coaches, players, executives and members of the media.

And, here they are, with my insightful and inciteful commentary on each one.

1. No longer allowing goaltenders to handle the puck behind the net.

Interesting - will stop the goalies acting as an extra defencemen, and will certainly help out forecheckers. I don't know that this is the most significant of the changes, though. As a side-thought, it will quite possibly lead to fewer goalies being injured, but that remains to be seen.

2. Reducing the width of goalie pads from 12 inches to 10.

Hooray! Compare these pictures to see why I'm enthusiastic about this...





Those pictures span about 20 years, so you can see the way things are moving. New materials available now should be able to shrink the goalies' pads without compromising their safety, and it will be nice to get back to an age when goaltenders actually had to move to make saves.

3. Rather than increasing the size of the nets, pushing the nets three feet closer to the end boards from the current 13 feet to 10.

I don't actually understand this one, although that's not meant to be a criticism. Perhaps they're just trying to make it easier for a lone forward to cut out a cross-ice, behind-the-net, pass? Anyone who wants to enlighten me on this one is welcome to have a go!

4. Resuming tag-up offsides, which allow offside skaters to clear the zone and let play continue.

Ironically, they originally removed tag-up offsides in order to try to increase flowing play through the neutral zone, which was anticipated to lead to more goals. However, it didn't work, and the NHL has wisely gone back to the way it was. This is a smart move.

5. Awarding three points for a regulation win in the AHL and two points for overtime and shootout wins, with the NHL adopting a similar format come 2005-06.

The best bit about this one is that they're going to try it out on the farm first. I don't know how much of an impact it will have, since I don't think playing for ties is as big a problem in ice hockey as it was in soccer when that sport adopted the 3-point win. That said, it probably won't hurt anything, and will certainly make a win something to really celebrate.

I think these are all good changes (even the one I don't understand). They left out a couple that I would have liked to see, in particular the institution of no-touch icing (does someone have to get killed before they go that route?). In addition, I think it may be time to look at reinstituting the full 2-minute power-play with unlimited goals, and maybe even reducing the number of players on the ice. This is a good start, however. That said, I must point out one thing - it's all going to be moot if there's no NHL next year, so perhaps now would be a good time to start working on a new CBA, hmm?